So Sarah Jessica Parker just released the first family photo since her twin girls were born.
Wow.
Look how perfect that is.
Everyone is all enchanted with the babies.
Sarah Jessica looks so tan and vibrant. As does her hair.
The babies look so angelic in their little pink blankets, all peaceful and content.
No one is crying...not even big brother James Wilke.Ferris Bueller Matthew Broderick looks a little older with the salt and pepper hair, but still....everyone looks picture perfect.
And then there's my first family picture, taken the evening I got home from the hospital:
1.) First of all, my husband isn't even in this photo.
2.) I look like I was sick with the flu and up with a newborn for the past 2 nights straight. Oh wait...that's right...I WAS.
3.) Would it have killed me to throw on a little lip gloss? I had to have known there was a high probability that someone was going to snap a pic of the first time Matthew met his brother.
4.) If the lip gloss was too much work, how about trying to keep MY EYES OPEN?!
5.) Did you catch the protective Mama Bear grip I've got on Carter? As if Matthew was a hungry wolf that was going to lunge at my baby cub at any moment? Could I have at least pretended for the two seconds the camera was on us that I trusted my son around his new baby brother?
6.) OMG. The enormous, pink water jug thing they give you in the hospital is in the bottom of my picture. Nice. Because heaven forbid anyone took that jug away from me and served me water in a normal glass. I would immediately break down into hysterics, crying "I'm just SO THIRSTY! Give me my jug back!!!"
7.) Oh and look.....the 24 hour coverage of the death of Anna Nicole Smith was on in the background! Because truly, isn't that what everyone wants in their new family pics?
Eat your heart out, Sarah Jessica. 
44 Comments!:
I know... don't you wish you could have a hair stylist, wardrobe and makeup artist for your first picture...... just saying! You still looked adorable... and the Anna Nicole coverage was big news.... everyone was watching, especially mothers of newborns! Thanks for the laugh!
You are too funny!
Ok, one huge difference........surrogate mother!
Your family is beautiful.
Well, she also gets away with no stretch marks. Is that really fair?!
You are neglecting one important fact which is that no infants in the SJP photo were squeezed out of her nether regions. Hence, her ability to put on lip gloss and avoid pink jugs is exponentially enhanced, as is her ability to have slept substantially the night before her older child met the newborns. Cut yourself some slack, friend.
On the other hand, one of SJ's twins in getting the shaft! Everyone is looking at her sister!
Oh yeah, I am with Mommytime...i think alot has to do with the lack of launch from the nether regions!
I could send you one of those pitchers if yours ever gets lost or broken :-D
Well, somebody else carried and birthed her kiddos, so I think you should cut yourself some slack. ;) I have two of those jugs. I love them.
i wish i had a team of people to make me glam everyday. my son brushes my hair and my dog provides "doggie kiss" lipgloss. classic! take care.
-Kiki
Hahaha! But your picture tells a story! SJP's picture is just so... posed! And while yes, it is nice, it's not funny and doesn't tell a story like yours does, so there! Right? And you look cute. Especially the way you're showing your fear and protecting your beautiful baby from his older brother. Very much the same way I was!
the pink water jug saved my life! And if the death grip hadn't worked you could have clubbed big brother with it!
hilarious and REAL...I love it!
When your rich enough to have mere commoners birth children for you, chances are you have the hair and makeup people too. Maybe even lady servants to dry you off after you get out of the tub!
i just spit out my water friend.
i am literally drinking out of the beloved hospital jug right now!
it's still my bff 20 months later.
I don't know why you can't just let Sarah Jessica bask in her happiness without making her feel bad about your perfect photo!
Love the water bottle. And Anna Nicole coverage.
Trust your son around his new baby brother right off the bat?! I think not.
My son (3.5 at the time) tried to off his baby sister first day she was home by placing a bean bag over her (she was on a blanket on the floor) and then laying on it. He was removed with great haste and his sister survived. There is always reason to suspect that siblings might want to off each other!
I'm also disappointed in you photo because all we got to sneek a peek at was your dining room table chair. Which doesn't give us a sense of our design style at the time. At least SJP, was nice enough to show off her couch. She apparently, is into floral patterns this season.
You and your readers are hysterical!!! I never had a pink jug from the hospital. However, I may have to copy you and credit you on this idea. One of my new family photos as we are leaving the hospital lobby shows my hubs kneeling next to me in the wheelchair and in his hand is a see-though bag of major maxi pads.
Now you know that Sarah's picture was staged with a photographer right. Bring in make up artists hair and wardrobe. Oh and lets not forget about the nanny that was probably there behind the camera having been the one to do most of the care of those babies so mom could actually sleep. Yeah, if life was actually like that then these pictures wouldn't look so glamorous ;).
Um are you kidding me? You look awesome for someone who just had a baby! You should see the pictures of me when I brought home my second son. Not pretty. Kind of like a whale. I've since been trying to delete all those blasted photos. Ugh.
I'm crying - honest. Hilarious!!
You do know that SJP used a surrogate, right?
Who am I kidding, 24 hours of hard labor, and she'd still have killer hair. With heels on.
LOVE the bottle. Seriously, I was like Gollum with Precious over mine. You look great!
I think you look perfect honey! Just perfect! You are what a real mom is! And, you don't have a nanny to take care of the screaming children during your sleeping hours!
OOHH, MMYYY Goooodness!!!! LMAO!!!
Mrs. LIAYF had one of those hug jugs too! I thought about just getting her a Keg of water and tapping it instead. Of course she would have drained that almost as fast.
BTW, you should have had your publicist set up a better first photo. You need to fire him.
Girl, don't sweat that picture one bit. I didn't have any shirts that fit me LOOSELY around the tummy/hips area the day I came home from the hospital, so you're way ahead of me!
Your picture has so much more flair. Oh yes, and you actually HAD your baby!
Ok, first of all - what's wrong with the baby Ferris is holding? Does she have cooties or one eye in the middle of her forehead or something?
Secondly - you look better after just having given birth than most women look on an average day.
Third - my water jug was brown. BROWN! Both times. Naturally, I left the stupid things at the hospital.
I like your picture better, it's REAL.
But ya, thats one heck of a grip you got on that baby!
McMommy, you are the funniest blogger! I totally wanted to take one of those pictures, but my hubby made me put it back. Loser! Ha!
Too funny! I was thinking Matthew Broderick was looking a little old in this picture.
You forgot to include the caption under the SJP pic: The twins were born to a surrogate mother in Ohio on June 22.
Makes all the difference. :) Cita
Your's is more real, I like it better reminds me of mine.
Isn't that what life really looks like?
Don't we all want someone to make us look perfect for our "first" family picture. You look more real!
Ferris is a bit gray...but still so handsome!
lmao. YOUR photo looks like sarah jessica in comparison to what MY photo looks like...
You know, this is what a normal family is like. Sure, if you had a professional photographer, hair dresser, stylist, etc...the photo would be a lot like SJPs. But, I love this one because it is candid and real. You still look great 2 days after having a baby!
Well next time remember to have a profesional photographer come over and snap pictures DAYS after the baby is born. Of course then it won't look as real or as natural as this and you won't remember the exact way you felt when your oldest got to meet the new baby for the very first time.
I'm taking notes as I read this - lol - bring lip gloss to the hospital - or I could just bring some lansinoh I suppose and kill two birds with one stone? :P
This is the digital age dearie... every perfect picture as at least 10 not so perfect ones siting on the hard drive... too bad they didn't show us the ones where the twins were crying and big brother was poking the baby in the eye.
I am sure SJP has a picture like that. She has to right?
At least that's what I like to believe so I can feel better about my all too real photo opps.
Sarah Jessica Parker's first family photo isn't that perfect. Look at the baby on the right, no one is paying any attention to it. Everyone is paying attention to the other one and even nicely props up her head. The other baby is bent over - rejected by the family.
Wonderful comparison.
I was nursing that big jug 'o water all the time too and was pretty possessive of it as well. I totally get it.
Point taken. Laughing so hard over here. Needed it. Thanks.
peace~elaine
Honestly---I like your picture better...seriously.
While I love SJP and her picture, we have to remember that she didn't actually GIVE BIRTH to her beautiful twins. My point? You look fabulous, McMommy!
Post a Comment